Things that im not scared to say
Typing really fast
Minimal editing
No restrictions
A thought experiment of creativity and courage
Aim: 100 things!
1. I feel alone
2. I'm lonely
3. I'm scared for the safety of the world
4. I'm scared of war
5. I feel so sorry for those who suffer
6. I think about how they r feeling
7. I want to do so much for the betterment of others
8. I'm willing to sacrifice a lot for a worthy cause
9. I want to be successful
10. I want to have a lot of money
11. I want to be married
12. I want children, adopted or biological
13. I want.to be in love again
14 I fantasise about being violent
15. I like intense physical sensations
16 I want to be hurt in a fight or a moshpit again
17 I want to punch people that deserve to be punched
18 kindness.is the answer
19 with my kindness I can change the world for the better
20 I want tp love
21 I want to forgive
22 I want to be more.generous
23 I used to steal from shops
24 I don't regret it
25 I enjoyed it
26 I enjoy breaking rules
27 but some ill never break, especially protecting women and children
28 I know my former friends have hurt women behind closed doors
29 I feel ashamed to be a man because of such men
30 I want to violently hurt such men
31 I fear for my sisters safety
32 this world is misogynistic and my gender is the problem
33 this world is bigoted and it bothers me
34 I want to be a leader in political movements in the future
35 I want to be a part of the change
36 literature can heal the world
37 writing is more profound than alchemy
38 writing is alchemy
39 writing feels better than sex
40 Sharing what I write feels scarier than a fight
41 I have been in many fights
42 my father violently beat me in ny whole childhood and early adulthood
43 it made me not want to be a man
44 and also scared of men
45 I'm slowly learning to love myself these days
46 I've been hurt since by others too
47 I never deserved to be hurt
48 but I also accepted the love of hurtful people because I didn't know any better
49 now I'm unlearning all those habits and I'm.so proud.of myself
50 I put up with shit behaviour from my family because I am ashamed to not have a supportive family
51 most this shit sound really sad but im actually really happy these days
52 I take a small dose of an antidepressant to cope with my PTSd
53 I'm.so ashamed of this but I have some symptoms.of autism. And am autistic
54 I have spent my whole.life learning to hide it, I want to hide it less and less
55 admitting that was the hardest thing so far in this post
56 I am so.lucky to have the love and support of my friends
57 they don't know how bad my family situations been, but yes, that's why I love my friends so much
58 times that I didn't want to live, reflecting on the love of my friends was one of my main motivations to want to better myself
59 I'm.so.glad I didn't kill myself
60 I'm so lucky to be Alive
61 taking my health and fitness is the best thing I've done for my sense of self as of late
62 health feels more abundant than any amount of.money I could ever have
63 with authentic intentions,.the job feels as if it's already done
64 I believe I could never lose, for my intentions are so authentic
65 no matter what anyone thinks of me, I care so deeply, and am a good person
66 I want to love myself more
*phew* that was hard!! Ran out of thoughts at 66/100
Baby Sparky xo
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